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The Joke Thread

RuneSR2
Level 16
I'll be happy to start  o:)

After 20 years of marriage, a wife decides to take her husband, Dave, to a strip club for his birthday.
She figures there's no harm in it if she's there with him, after all.
They arrive at the club and the doorman says, "Hey, Dave! How ya doin'?"
His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.
"Oh no," says Dave. "He's on my bowling team."
When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual and brings over a glass of red wine.
His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says,"How did she know that you drink that?"
"She's in the Ladies Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them."
A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, and says "Hi Davey. Want your usual table dance, big boy?"
Dave's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.
He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.
She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every name in the book.
The cabby turns his head and says, "Looks like you picked up a real witch tonight, Dave."
Intel i7 7700K (4.5 GHz); MSI GeForce GTX 1080 8GB Gaming X (oc 2100 MHz gpu boost, 11 GHz mem speed); 16GB Corsair Vengeance DDR4 3200 MHz; MSI Z270I Gaming Pro Carbon AC (VR-Ready) mainboard; Samsung 961 Evo M.2 SSD 128GB (for OS) + Samsung EVO 860 4TB SSD (for games) + Toshiba P300 High-Performance HDD 3TB (for games); Win10 OS; Valve Index and Oculus Rift CV1, the latter nearly always using super sampling 2.0.

"Ask not what VR can do for you – ask what you can do for VR"
138 REPLIES 138

RuneSR2
Level 16
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Intel i7 7700K (4.5 GHz); MSI GeForce GTX 1080 8GB Gaming X (oc 2100 MHz gpu boost, 11 GHz mem speed); 16GB Corsair Vengeance DDR4 3200 MHz; MSI Z270I Gaming Pro Carbon AC (VR-Ready) mainboard; Samsung 961 Evo M.2 SSD 128GB (for OS) + Samsung EVO 860 4TB SSD (for games) + Toshiba P300 High-Performance HDD 3TB (for games); Win10 OS; Valve Index and Oculus Rift CV1, the latter nearly always using super sampling 2.0.

"Ask not what VR can do for you – ask what you can do for VR"

Digikid1
Level 12

RuneSR2 said:

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Amazingly that last one is 100% true!  LOL

LZoltowski
Volunteer Moderator
Volunteer Moderator
Guys, I really don't want things to get out of hand on this page. People are of different sensitivities and jokes tend to be a little bit too on the nose. Keep them clean or the thread is closing.
Core i7-7700k @ 4.9 Ghz | 32 GB DDR4 Corsair Vengeance @ 3000Mhz | 2x 1TB Samsung Evo | 2x 4GB WD Black
ASUS MAXIMUS IX HERO | MSI AERO GTX 1080 OC @ 2000Mhz | Corsair Carbide Series 400C White (RGB FTW!) 

Be kind to one another 🙂

RuneSR2
Level 16
Fair enough - so no hardcore stuff - I hope this one won't cross the line  o:)

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(My motivation for this thread was to add some humor to the forum - in contrast to the often heated debates concerning new hardware and games.) 
Intel i7 7700K (4.5 GHz); MSI GeForce GTX 1080 8GB Gaming X (oc 2100 MHz gpu boost, 11 GHz mem speed); 16GB Corsair Vengeance DDR4 3200 MHz; MSI Z270I Gaming Pro Carbon AC (VR-Ready) mainboard; Samsung 961 Evo M.2 SSD 128GB (for OS) + Samsung EVO 860 4TB SSD (for games) + Toshiba P300 High-Performance HDD 3TB (for games); Win10 OS; Valve Index and Oculus Rift CV1, the latter nearly always using super sampling 2.0.

"Ask not what VR can do for you – ask what you can do for VR"

MAC_MAN86
Level 9
KNOCK KNOCK...I said KNOCK KNOCK...ok BANG BANG...BANG BANG BANG...BANG BANG BANG BANG...
gives in and kicks the door down!
>Oh it's you!
Yes I just wanted to ask you to turn the music down but now you need a new front door! 😄 😄

nalex66
Volunteer Moderator
Volunteer Moderator
Here are some stupid dad jokes that made me chuckle the other day...

Edit: poor formatting, so I broke the image up and trimmed some fat:
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i7 5820K @ 4.25GHz | EVGA GTX 1080 SC | Gigabyte GA-X99-UD4 | Corsair DDR4 3000 32GB | Corsair HX 750W
SSDs: Intel 660p M.2 2TB, 3x Samsung Evo 1TB | Startech PCIe 4x USB 3.0 | Startech PCIe 2x USB C 3.1 gen2

RuneSR2
Level 16
Posted on Reddit a few days ago, but I think it fits perfectly in this thread  B)

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Intel i7 7700K (4.5 GHz); MSI GeForce GTX 1080 8GB Gaming X (oc 2100 MHz gpu boost, 11 GHz mem speed); 16GB Corsair Vengeance DDR4 3200 MHz; MSI Z270I Gaming Pro Carbon AC (VR-Ready) mainboard; Samsung 961 Evo M.2 SSD 128GB (for OS) + Samsung EVO 860 4TB SSD (for games) + Toshiba P300 High-Performance HDD 3TB (for games); Win10 OS; Valve Index and Oculus Rift CV1, the latter nearly always using super sampling 2.0.

"Ask not what VR can do for you – ask what you can do for VR"

Techy111
Volunteer Moderator
Volunteer Moderator
sfy8ttfcyjdt.jpg
A PC with lots of gadgets inside and a thing to see in 3D that you put on your head.

vannagirl
Level 12


Guys, I really don't want things to get out of hand on this page. People are of different sensitivities and jokes tend to be a little bit too on the nose. Keep them clean or the thread is closing.


Yes I agree

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Anyhoows 

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 😮  😛
Look, man. I only need to know one thing: where they are.